So I have been thinking lately about forgiveness. It is not always easy for me. I tend to wear my heart right out on my shoulder, and when someone hurts me - it is practically devastating. I strive to be so perfect - the perfect wife, perfect lawyer, perfect daughter, perfect friend - that when people do not respond to me in a way I see as nice or genuine, it can paralyze me.
I have been praying off and on about some relationships and general life issues in particular that are really just weighing on my heart. I have SO much to be thankful and grateful for. God has blessed us abundantly. But I can't stop thinking about those people in my life, or the situations I encounter, that are less than perfect.
However, God can't change my heart unless I am open and willing. I think that in order for these relationships to grow, I need to HONESTLY forgive the past wrongs. Even if there has been a list of wrongs. And even if the wrongs keep happening. Some of the relationships and situations are not going to change. Period. So I need to change my heart. I need to forgive, so that I can allow Jesus to help me love - irregardless of what I expect to receive in return.
I know it won't be easy. And I have been trying for a LONG time. But I need to step up my game.
"Forgiveness is the economy of the heart... forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits."
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
Yikes! It's been a long time.
So for the one to two people who actually MAY look at this, I apologize for being a lazy blogger. Life has been seemingly crazy here lately.
I started my first "big girl" job with an actual paycheck and benefits on October 3rd. Jumped in head first and have never looked back. Most of the time, when I have a client, I just have this overwhelming urge to say "Who in the heck thought it was smart to let ME be in charge here?!" But then I reign myself in and realize I do have SOME brains and a stack of letters behind my name. So surely I can manage.
Then, October 4th was my 26th birthday. My first birthday WORKING in a "big girl" job. It was actually a pretty great day. Although I had court all day, my second momma made me delicious champagne cupcakes and brought them to the courthouse (where she also works). J and my mom both sent me flowers. My momma and daddy cooked a wonderful southern meal for me that night. And gave me/us a new set of luggage! Woot! Along with a new Vera Bradley briefcase. And my in-laws got me a new Vera Bradley purse. All in Suzanni.
So all in all, it was a pretty great birthday, I must say.
This past weekend, J and I worked in our yard. I LOVE Fall and decorating, so of course, this being our first fall as a married couple, I just had to spruce things up a bit. We had such a good time working outside together. That is how I know I have married my best friend - even doing something as seemingly mundane as yard work, we have a ball together. Saturday evening, we invited Dust & Case over, and Adam and Danielle, for a little cook-out and firepit time. It was so fun just to sit outside and laugh over our ridiculous medical stories. Pretty sure we all learned WAY too much about everyone!!
I will say - I hated to see Monday come. On a bright note, I put some beans in the "crackpot" this morning, so dinner will be mostly done when I get home. Nothing like some good 'ole ham 'n beans and cornbread!
XOXO- C
I started my first "big girl" job with an actual paycheck and benefits on October 3rd. Jumped in head first and have never looked back. Most of the time, when I have a client, I just have this overwhelming urge to say "Who in the heck thought it was smart to let ME be in charge here?!" But then I reign myself in and realize I do have SOME brains and a stack of letters behind my name. So surely I can manage.
Then, October 4th was my 26th birthday. My first birthday WORKING in a "big girl" job. It was actually a pretty great day. Although I had court all day, my second momma made me delicious champagne cupcakes and brought them to the courthouse (where she also works). J and my mom both sent me flowers. My momma and daddy cooked a wonderful southern meal for me that night. And gave me/us a new set of luggage! Woot! Along with a new Vera Bradley briefcase. And my in-laws got me a new Vera Bradley purse. All in Suzanni.
So all in all, it was a pretty great birthday, I must say.
This past weekend, J and I worked in our yard. I LOVE Fall and decorating, so of course, this being our first fall as a married couple, I just had to spruce things up a bit. We had such a good time working outside together. That is how I know I have married my best friend - even doing something as seemingly mundane as yard work, we have a ball together. Saturday evening, we invited Dust & Case over, and Adam and Danielle, for a little cook-out and firepit time. It was so fun just to sit outside and laugh over our ridiculous medical stories. Pretty sure we all learned WAY too much about everyone!!
I will say - I hated to see Monday come. On a bright note, I put some beans in the "crackpot" this morning, so dinner will be mostly done when I get home. Nothing like some good 'ole ham 'n beans and cornbread!
XOXO- C
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