Be Still

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Delighting in the Lord

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

What exactly does it mean to delight yourself in the Lord? Is it to praise His righteous name, even in the times when you want to cry out and question? Is it to be a walking, talking example of the Christian faith - even when you make a mistake? Is it sharing in the joys of our Christian faith, in any way you can?

I am struggling to live and believe this verse each day. To delight myself in Him, through ALL things. To consistently be a beacon of light to those who may be wondering in the dark. To speak in a way that when someone hears, they just know that I am radiating God's love to the world.

I believe that the Lord will give me the desires of my heart - and He knows what those are - in His timing. But am I doing enough? Am I delighting enough? Am I sharing enough?

Salad Days

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"...My salad days, / When I was green in judgment, cold in blood..."

~William Shakespeare

 "Salad Days" typically refers to a "youthful" time in a persons life, the heyday of their youth or the peak of their abilities.

You see, I feel like right now, I am smack dab in the middle of some of my best "salad days." Justin and I are young, newlyweds (btw - how long can you hold on to that title?), no kids. We both have great jobs with income - and nothing to spend it on but ourselves. We can go and do without batting an eye. If we get a wild hair, we jump on it.

In 2012, we kicked off our year on a cruise in the Bahamas. In April, we made a road trip to Florida and spent four GLORIOUS days at Disney World fulfilling perhaps the biggest wish on my Baby Bucket List. In May/June we trekked back to Florida for a week at the beach. We spent a few days at Osage Beach in August, and spent a long weekend in St. Louis in September for our anniversary. We made it to two Cardinals games (one which we literally had about 4 hours notice, took the tickets and made a FLYING trip to STL) and to the Fox Theater twice. We spent a few days in Dallas, TX at the end of September. It was, as we like to say, the Poleys "Year of Fun."

In between all the traveling, we ate a lot of good food, saw some good movies, and shopped - a lot. We bought a new vehicle (thank you Jesus) since both of ours were holding out since college.  I made some changes to our home, and we eventually put it on the market. We paid off a lot of debt. And anytime we decided to go and do, whether it was a vacation or just to the movies, the only thing we had to worry about was making sure we were off work and Oreo could stay with my parents.

And we never, ever went without something we needed - rarely going without anything we wanted (within reason, of course). When you have a family of two, there is a lot of room in the budget for fun.

I can't help but look back and think how amazingly blessed we are. What a year. I mean, seriously - it was amazing to be able to see and experience so much together.

Entering 2013, I kept thinking about what this year is going to bring. And while I LOVED the past year we experienced, I hope 2013 is not as full - at least, in a material way. Because we don't want to be just a family of two anymore, with no one else to spend our money on. We don't want to not have to think twice about up and leaving when we get a wild hair, because we are just a family of two..... And I just don't know how easy that is going to be for us.

We sat down and had a long conversation because we finally had some serious interest on our house. The home we are looking to purchase is significantly more than what our mortgage is now. It is a balancing act for sure. Would we rather come home each evening to a place that felt peaceful, serene and sheltered - or go on a cruise and to the beach and replace my old, decrepit car? But what if we buy this home only to find out that we will have to pay thousands of dollars to have a baby? Because if anyone else out there has tried selling a house in this market - when you finally get an offer, it is asinine to wait for something better to come along!

I just don't know. So many unanswered questions. But what I do know is this. Our salad days of 2012 have the potential of looking much, much different than our salad days of 2013. Because I am praying, that the days of 2013 become filled with deciding which paint color the bathroom should be or where we should place our furniture instead of which bikinis I should pack for the beach.  I am praying that our days of 2013 are filled with appointments to see our growing baby instead of weekends dashing from one mall or ballgame to the next.

I am so grateful at what this last year has offered. We made so many memories of just the two of us that can never, ever be replaced. No amount of money in the world could change the way we would have spent them. But I have this longing, this desire, for our days to slowly change into something else.

And please, feel free to remind me - when I am 90 months pregnant one day, trying to move into a new house in the middle of a sweltering summer heatwave OR massive winter snow storm, that I asked for this :) 

Christmas Time is Here

This is gonna be a picture dump of Christmas fun.

Our Christmas this year was super busy but as always, a lot of fun. I feel like Christmas gets so rushed though... We crammed in three activities on Christmas Eve, plus our church Communion service, and it was really too much. I was anxious all day and kept feeling like we had to leave one place to get to another without really enjoying the moment.

We started out Christmas Eve at my parents house to briefly celebrate my sweet, handsome baby brother's 24th birthday. Poor baby gets lost in the Christmas shuffle, but we always take a little time out for him to momentarily celebrate his special day.

The Birthday Boy!

After watching Zach open presents, we headed to Justin's Grandma's house. I did not get any pictures there - but it was loud, crowded and full of little ones ripping open the gifts. I told Justin I always feel a little out of place, though - we are the only ones there without kids (other than his younger sister - whose name is still in the "kids" Christmas drawing!) so when it is present time, we are like those to weirdos just hanging out creepin' on other people's children. Which is silly - because they are our family. I love watching our niece and little cousins as they excitedly open gifts. But it does leave an odd place in your heart when that is what you desire.

We left Justin's Grandmas and headed straight to our church to meet my family, plus Justin's sister and her boyfriend, for Christmas Eve communion. Then, we headed from there to my parents to celebrate with my immediate family.

My sister, her husband and my niece and nephew, plus their new puppy Sunshine "Sunny" Hahs along with my aunt and her friend. Time was crunched because we had to get back to Justin's family, but we had an enjoyable time. We played a white elephant game and the kids opened their gifts.

Ella's Santa Clause impersonation.

We then headed over to Justin's parents to do their side of Christmas, because his Dad and brother both had to work odd shifts on Christmas day. It was a tight squeeze with all of us and a mountain of presents, but it is always a fun time! Wouldn't have it any other way.  I scored some awesome clothes and some new Vera, so really - couldn't get much better for me.

The Bratton Tree

Chaos!

Taking a quick photo break.

Opening gifts.

Christmas morning, Justin and I woke up and had some time just the two (really three with Oreo) of us to open our gifts to one another.

The Poley Tree

Checking out his Santa gift.

Sparkle Toms!

Dress shirts. Oh yeah.

We then headed over to my parents. It is a family tradition for my Dad to cook up a huge and delicious breakfast Christmas morning. We ate ourselves silly then enjoyed opening gifts.

Tree & the loot.

13th Christmas together.

Just because he's so handsome.

Chloe & Zach

We spent the rest of the day laying around in our pajamas and visiting with both our families. It was definitely a wonderful Christmas holiday for the Poleys!

Wicked!

The Saturday before Christmas, Justin and I along with his twin brother and his wife went to the Fabulous Fox to see Wicked! It was AMAZING. Seriously. We had a really good time together.

We went to eat at Zia's on the Hill first, and the food was wonderful :)

With my lovely at Zias.

 

"I need my bangs pinned back to eat!"

After eating lunch, we headed to the Fox. The Fox Theater is a magical place in general. But it was breathtaking decorated for Christmas. There is something about walking in that almost makes me lose my breath for a split second. I LOVE the feeling.

Wicked, like I said earlier, was awesome. I wish we would have had better seats, but hey - beggars can't be choosers, people. The ones we had were fairly expensive! I couldn't get any pictures in the actual theater because CAMERAS AREN'T ALLOWED and the volunteers may lose their JOBS if they let you snap a photo.... But here are a couple outside!

By the pretty tree.

Outside the theater with my favorite people!

 It was such a good day and a great way to celebrate my brother & sister-in-law's SECOND wedding anniversary! I am still a little tiffed they had to go all willy-nilly and elope and get married without us (aka, the two most important people EVER ;-)) but I guess I will forgive them eventually. It's not like it was THEIR special day or anything and all about what they wanted!! At least they allow us to celebrate with them yearly. Hehe.